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Lauren and Miley Musical Cliptastic Countdown is an episode inspired on the Phineas and Ferb episode: Phineas and Ferb Musical Cliptastic Countdown.

TranscriptEdit

TV Announcer: From the LMT studio in marginally attractive downtown, Danville in animated in front of a studio audience, it's the Lauren and Miley Musical Ciptastic Countdown! And now, our hosts, from the opposite ends of the moral, ethical, and philosophical spectrum, Gabriella Donna and Dr. Spade!

Donna: Hello, Danville!

Spade: Yes, we're takin' break from our usual hostili- hold on, I gotta go back one. Your first name is...Gabrielle?

Donna: Yes. Spelt with an a. 

Spade: Spelf with an a? Wouldn't that be "Gabrialla"?

Donna: No, G-A-B-R-I-E-L-L-A. It's the feminine spelling.

Spade: Gabriella?

Donna: Yes. Anyway, we're not here to discuss my name. We're here 'coz everyone 'round the world logged on to vote their favorite Lauren and Miley musical video clips. And we're countin' 'em down! Starting from number 10. Are ya ready, Dr. Spade?

Spade: Gabrielle, Gabriella, Gabby. Yes, very feminine.

Donna: Y'see, this is just why I go by "Major".

[Song: Ready for the Bettys]

Crash: Ladies and gentlemen, Candace and her best friend, Stacey.

You gotta bring your Betty bongos

And your Betty bass guitar

And with the Betty back beat

You'll go Betty, Betty far


So drop your boring luggage

And come with Missy, Tink and Crash

There's a Betty (there's a Betty) Bandwagon

Going to a Betty bash! (Going to a Betty bash!)


Get ready for the Bettys, ready for the Bettys

Get ready for the Bettys, ready for the Bettys

(Ready for the Bettys)

Get ready for the Bettys, ready for the Bettys


It's the best thing you can do! (Best thing you can do!)

Get ready for the Bettys 'coz the Bettys are ready for you!

Stacey: So, whaddya think your sisters are doing?

Candace: Who cares?


Donna: So, how did you like that, one S-lady?

Spade: Too loud. Kids today with their rock 'n' roll.

Donna: Well, here's a deaf jam that's really kicking it old school.

Spade: Y'know that street lingo thing? Y'can't really pull that thing off.

Donna: Fine. Roll number 9!

Spade: Just tellin' ya as a friend.

[Song: Queen of Mars]

[Candace]

I was just a lonely girl
Looking for a little fun
Though without a friend in the world
I was forced to find a new one


Now I'm queen of Mars
I was invisible before
It only took a magic portal to Mars
To give me some self-worth


You put a crown on my head and
You all seem to worship me
You don't understand a word I've said
But you treat me like royalty


'Coz I'm queen of Mars
I was invisible before
It only took a magic portal to Mars
To give me some self worth

Lauren: Whoo-hoo! Follow the music, Miley.


Donna: I'm over here with Cindy, an animated member of our studio audience.

Elena: [pushes Cindy away] Lauren and Miley rock! Whoo-hoo!

Donna: Okay then, let's throw it to my partner in crime. Not that I'd prepitrate a crime with her, of course, I'd never..Lora! Who wrote these cards?

Lora: Agent M.

Spade: What's that all 'bout? She's usin' a typewriter. When was the last time ya saw someone usin' a typewriter? What's this, 1987?

Donna: Well..

Spade: Ya realize that most of the kids watchin' this show have never ever seen a typewriter, right? 

Donna: We're on a budget.

Spade: So ya went to Whatever: Everything from the Dark Side. 

Donna: We're movin' on. Number eight, roll tape!

Spade: Oh, so ya got tape, you're not just usin' films, or-or hand shadows.

[Song: Ain't Got Rhythm]

[Lauren]

So you're saying you don't have rhythm,
But listen what you're doing right there
With that stamp and a book
You gotta real nice look
Sounds to me like you've got
Rhythm to spare

[Ladonna]

I have no idea what you're talking about
I have as much rhythm as that chair
What happened to me was a tragedy
But I don't have to be a millionaire
Look, I have a sweet deal going on there
I got all the books I can read
All these old sweet ladies and this carpet from the 80's
What more could a librarian need?

Woman: Shh!

[Ladonna]

Besides, I ain't got rhythm
No, I ain't got rhythm
Said I ain't got rhythm
I ain't got rhythm

[Lauren]

You're kidding me right, y-you're kidding me
Don't you see what you were doing right then?
That's a wicked groove you were starting to move
Miss, you have got rhythm tenfold

[Ladonna]

I think perhaps you're not listening
I find it tedious to repeat
It's no big crime
I just can't keep time
I'm telling you I lost the beat


I don't need my face on T-shirts
Or a hit-powered guitar
They were screaming my name
I guess it's a shame
But I don't need to be a pop star


Besides, I ain't got rhythm
No, I ain't got rhythm
Said I ain't got rhythm
I ain't got rhythm

[Lauren] Sounds like rhythm to me

[Ladonna] No, I ain't got rhythm

[Lauren] Seems like they all agree

[Ladonna] Said I ain't got rhythm

[Lauren] But you're laying down some funky syncopation!

[Ladonna] I ain't got rhythm

[Lauren] But you got that beat!

[Ladonna] No, I ain't got rhythm

[Lauren] Look at them, they're stomping their feet

[Ladonna] Said I ain't got rhythm

[Lauren] It's time for you to rock a brand new generation

[Library patrons] Brand new generation

[Lauren and Ladonna] Gonna rock a brand new generation

[Ladonna] 'Coz I ain't got rhythm!

[Library patrons]

Ain't got rhythm
Ain't got rhythm
Ain't got rhythm
Ain't got rhythm

[Ladonna] Hey, I got rhythm!


Spade: Okay, so I figured out I couldn't come here empty-handed, so I brought a little something for all of us to enjoy! Behold, the Video Clip-inator venom! Y'see, when I was just a snakeling, my mom and dad never allow me watch video clips. 

Donna: No, no, no! We don't have time for scarring backstory!

Spade: Yes, maybe I should give you an emotionally scarring front story! [slithers off]

Donna: That doesn't even make any sense.

Spade: It doesn't have to, 'coz I have a monster truck! Whoo-hoo!

Donna: Video number-

Spade: Number 7!

Donna: That was my foot!

[Song: I Love You Mom]

[Candace]

Mom, it's your birthday
Thanks for all the care and love you give

Lauren: Nice song, sis.

[Candace]

Not to mention the meals
And times I get the kind of nervous

Lauren: C'mon!

[Candace]

And forget to tell you how I feel
I'm a little high-strung
It's just because I'm young
Mom, I adore ya
And I'll do anything for ya


Although my sisters make me frantic
With every single crazy antic
And when I'm bouncing off the walls
You're the one that stays calm


Because you love me and for who I am
I'll always love you, Mom
(Ooh)


Spade: What Donna doesn't know is that this ain't just a Video Clip-inator venom, it's really a Mind Control Video Clip-inator venom! AHAHAHAHAHA..oh, I didn't say Video Clip-inator venom, I said. Mimes control my gators! See, look over there! And ya thought I was makin' it up! Now, video clip number 6!

[Song: Remembering]

[Candace]

Remembering, remembering
It's a kind of funny thing
It makes me and time go by
A glad hello and say goodbye
It's for all of my dreams
Remembering makes dream appear
The good, the bad, or even sad
My remembering


Donna; That was fresh!! I'm making that for my ringtone as well! Now, I've got a surprise for all youngsters, who has his own death theme song..

Audience: Doo bee doo bee doo bah, doo bee doo bee doo bah

Donna: That's right. It's Perry, or I like to call him Agent P! Doo bee doo bee doo bah, doo bee doo bee doo bah..Perry!


Lauren: Hey, where's Perry?

Miley: He's doing on a special guest appearance on a video clip show.

Lauren: Hmm. Good for him.


Donna: So, Agent P, what're your thoughts on the videos we've been watching? [Perry chatters] Well, thanks for coming. And I think that sets up our next music clip perfectly. Now, the top 5 songs. Ladies and gentlemen, music clip number 5.

[Song: Don't You Worry Child]

There was a time, I used to look on my father's eyes

In a happy home, I was a king, I had a throne

Those days are gone, now the memories are on the wall

I still hear the sounds from the place I was born


Up on the hill across the lake

That's where I still have my first heart break

I still remember how it changed

My father said

Don't you worry, don't you worry child

See the heaven's got a plan for you

Don't you worry, don't you worry now

Yeah!


Don't you worry, don't you worry now

Yeah!

Ooh ooh ooh oooooh!

See the heaven's got a plan for you

Ooh ooh ooh oooooh!


There was a time, I met a friend of a different kind

We ruled the world

Thought I'd never lose her outta sight, we were so young

I think of her and now then

I still hear the song, reminding me of her


Up the hill across the blue lake

That's where I had my first heart break

I still remember how it changed

My father said

Don't you worry, don't you worry child

See the heaven's got plan for ya

Don't you worry, don't you worry now

Yeah!


Don't you worry, don't you worry child

See the heaven's got a plan for you

Don't you worry, don't you worry now

Yeah!

Ooh ooh ooh oooooh!

See the heaven's got a plan for ya

Ooh ooh ooh oooooh!

Yeah!


Spade: Don't run 'way, folks. When we come back, we'll have our final tour...plus, a video that'll ENSLAVE THE TRI-STATE AREA!!! HAHAHA...I mean...engrave my candy-plate carrier! Look! It's silver. It was a wedding gift. I got it in the divorce. That's right, ladies, I'm available! Wait, you're gettin' paid for this? I have to do this for the community service! I gotta do like, 200 hours!

Donna: The show's just a half an hour long.

Spade: I gotta do this....400 TIMES??!!!

Donna: Oh, and we're back. We're counting down your favorite Lauren and Miley songs. 

Spade: Well, ya are definitely buying touch. 

Donna: And here's a number which I like to call it four.

[Song: Little Sisters]

[Stacey]

Little sisters
I remember when you first came home
Then came another
Little sister of our own


Even when you break my toys
You'll always be my
Little sisters
'Coz you're younger, we're related, and you're girls


Even when you're making too much noise
You will always be my
Little sisters
'Coz you're younger, we're related, and you're girls


Little sisters.. x3

Candace: Ugh, Stacey, I think you're bumming me out with that song.


Donna: Tubular. If I've been wearing spikes, they would've rocked off.

Spade: Ya don't wear spikes?

Donna: But not at the moment. Lora, how are my spikes coming?

Lora: Almost finished.

Donna: Well, here's musical video clip number 3.

[Song: Busted Extended Version]

[Vanessa]

I can see the things you're doing
And you think I'm naive
But when I get the goods on you
She'll finally believe

[Candace]

Well she says it's just all drama
But every bubble's got to pop!
She's gonna see what you're doing

[Both]

And then you're finally have to stop!
Don't you think you're gonna win this time
'Coz better believe I'm gonna drop a dime on you
I'll get ya! (yeah!)
I'll get ya!
And when I do, you're gonna be busted! 
(Busted!)


I don't wanna put the hurt on you
But you better believe me
When I tell you I got the dirt on you
You're busted.
(Busted!)

[Vanessa] Yeah, she's finally gonna see the light

[Both]

This is how it's gonna be
When she finds out I'm always right,
You're busted
(Busted!)


There's a new cop on the beat
And I'm bringing down the heat

[Candace]

My eyes are wise to all your lies
'Coz you're not that discreet

[Vanessa] And I don't care what you've heard

[Both] 'Coz there is one-six letter word

[Vanessa] It's gonna set me free

[Candace] Set me free

[Vanessa] It starts with a "B"!

[Candace] (Starts with a "B"!)

[Both] 

It goes B-U-S-T-E-D!
You're busted!
(Busted!)
Don't you think you're gonna win this time

[Vanessa]

Yeah, she's finally gonna see the light
Drop a dime on you

[Both]

This is how it's gonna be
When she finds out I'm always right
I'll get ya! I'll get ya!
You're busted!


Donna: Fantastic. Say, Spade, what'cha workin' over there?

Spade: Your doom. [drops a cage on Donna]

Donna: Great googly-moogly. Lora, get me Agent P.

Lora: He's on the green room.

Donna: Well, that'd be easy then. Roll to video number 2.

[Song: Save the World Tonight]

Into the streets, we're comin' down

We never sleep, never get tired

Through urban fields, and suburban life


Turn up the crowd now, we'll never back down

Shoot down a skyline, watch it in primetime

Turn the love up now, listen up now, turn up the love


Who's gonna save the world tonight?

Who's gonna bring it back to life?

We're gonna make it, you and I

We're gonna save the world tonight


Oh oh oh oh, oh oh oh oh oh x4


We're far from home, it's the better

What we dream, it's all that matters

We're on our way, united


Turn up the crowd now, we'll never back down

Shoot down a skyline, watch it in primetime

Turn the love up now, listen up now, turn up the love


Who's gonna save the world tonight?

Who's gonna bring it back to life?

We're gonna make it, you and I

We're gonna save the world tonight


Oh oh oh oh, oh oh oh oh oh x4


Who's gonna save?

Who's gonna bring?

We're gonna make it, you and I


Who's gonna save?

Who's gonna bring?

We're gonna save the world tonight


Spade: [laughing, maniacally] Now my ultimate triumph is in hand! Prepare to be hypnotized by a video scientifically created to get stuck on your heads. FOREVER!

[Song: My Name is Spade]

[Spade]

My name is Spade,
And you'll do what I say,
Whoop! Whoop!
My name is Spade
And you'll do what I say
Whoop! Whoop!

Donna: No!!!!!!!!

[Spade]

My name is Spade,
And you'll do what I say
Whoop! Whoop!

[Singular victim]

Her name is Spade
And I'll do what she says
Whoop! Whoop!

[Spade]

My name is-[Perry crashes in]

Donna: Avert your ears, Agent P! Cover your ears!

[Spade]

My name is Spade,
And you'll do what I say,
Whoop! Whoop!
My name is Spade,
And you'll do what I say
Whoop! Whoop!
My name--

Spade: No, no, no, no, oh, get back in there! Wait! Why isn't...Perry the Platypus?! I swear. all of mammals I hang with, you're the most uncooperative!

[Crowd of victims]

Her name is Spade,
And we'll do what she says,
Whoop whoop!
Her name is Spade
And we'll do what she says
Whoop whoop!


Spade: It's workin'! It's workin'!

Donna: Oh no, Agent P, it's stuck on their heads. We need something more catchy to counteract it. But what'd we...Agent P? Agent P, this is no time for decorating. Oh, I see.

Spade: No! Not the number one requested Lauren and Miley song! New extended version, never seen before. Not that!

[Song: Gitchee Gitchee Goo Extended Version]

Lauren: Ladies and gentlemen, the Milebettes! I'm Lauren and this is Miley, and we're gonna sing a song.

[Lauren] Bow, chicka bow-wow!

[Candace/Milebettes] That's what my baby says!

[Lauren] Mow, mow, mow!

[Candace/Milebettes] And my heart starts pumpin'!

[Lauren] Chicka, chicka boo wap!

[Candace/Milebettes] Never gonna stop!

[All] Gitchee gitchee goo means that I love you!


[Lauren] 

My baby's got her own way of talkin'
Whenever she says something sweet
And she knows it's my world she's a rockin'
Though my vocabulary's incomplete!
I know it may sound confusing

[Milebettes] Ooh!

[Lauren] 

Sometimes I wish she'd give it to me straight!
But I never feel like I'm losing!

[Candace/Milebettes] Losing!

[Lauren] When I take the time to translate!


[All] Here's what I'm talkin' 'bout!

[Lauren] Bow, chicka bow-wow!

[Milebettes] That's what my baby says!

[Lauren] Mow, mow, mow!

[Milebettes] And my heart starts pumping!

[Lauren] (Oh) Chicka chicka choo wap!

[Milebettes] Never gonna stop!

[All] Gitchee gitchee goo means that I love you!


[Lauren] 'Coz when I say I love you..

[Milebettes] When I say I love you!

[Lauren] She says, "I gitchee gitchee goo you, too!"

[Milebettes/Candace] Gitchee gitchee goo you too!

[Lauren] Gitchee gitchee goo you too!

[Milebettes/Candace] Gitchee gitchee goo you too!


[Lauren] 

Don't need a dictionary!
I said, a bow chicka bow-wow!

[Candace/Milebettes] That's what my baby says!

[Lauren] Mow, mow, mow!

[Candace/Milebettes] And my heart starts pumping!

[Lauren] Chicka chicka choo wap!

[Candace/Milebettes] Never gonna stop!

[All]

Gitchee gitchee goo means that I love you!
Gitchee gitchee goo means that I love you!
Gitchee gitchee goo means..
That I love you baby, baby, baby!

[Miley] Baby-baby-baby-baby

[All] Gitchee gitchee goo means that I love you!


Donna: Great job, Agent P. You stopped Spade, saved Tri-State Aera, and finished the musical countdown. Well, thanks for tuning in, folks. We'll see ya next time. Say goodnight, Spade.

Spade: Y'know, someday I'll escape from the cage, but your name will still be Gabriella.

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